the ears in every room

We all have moments when we're tired, frustrated, or just need to vent. But here's what most people don't realize: the conversations you think are private often aren't. And the people overhearing them might have more power over your future than you think.

As a veteran music journalist turned streaming strategist and brand advisor, I've witnessed this dynamic from both sides of the mic. After interviewing hundreds of artists back-to-back at industry events, I discovered something that applies whether you're networking at a conference, waiting for a job interview, or grabbing coffee with a friend.

Every room you're in holds potential. Potential clients, future collaborators, industry connections, or people who can impact your career. What you say and how you engage matters, even when you think no one important is listening.

Case in point: Years back, I was assigned to interview a relatively unknown artist at 8am, right after his morning radio rounds. I arrived early, prepped and caffeinated, ready to write a positive feature introducing him to our readership. The artist and his manager rolled into the hotel lobby, grabbing cappuccinos and debriefing their morning. They didn't know what I looked like or that I was within earshot of their conversation:

Artist: "Man, that was a complete waste of my time."

Manager: "You did great. I thought it went well."

Artist: "Tell me again why I should care about [radio station]?"

Manager: "Because they're in 50 key markets. And that PD has a lot of influence."

Artist: [eye roll] "If you say so. So what's next?"

Manager: "The interview for Crossroads magazine."

Artist: [loud sigh] "Great. Same questions. Same bullshit."

Now you can't unhear what you hear, right? And what I heard was entitlement, hubris, and negativity from someone who clearly didn't understand the importance of his role or the room he was in. The die was cast. 

When we were officially introduced, I shook his hand and thanked him for his time. We settled into our chairs, I hit record, and then — because it wasn’t my job to like him and because I  tend to say what I mean — I said: "How about we cut to the chase, avoid all the same old questions and bullshit, and get to the meat?" Let’s just say it was a ‘caught on the jumbotron kiss cam with the wrong woman’ kind of moment for him.

The  takeaway? I walked in prepared to write something positive, but his attitude—on full display when he thought it didn't matter—had already shifted the atmosphere and my entire interview strategy. I had 45 minutes reserved for him; he got 10, and I was outta there.

 It's a powerful reminder: whether you're building a brand or climbing any career ladder, your work isn't something you have to do; it's something you get to do. 

Kindness, professionalism, and positivity. Always. Because you never know who’s listening. How you treat people when you think it doesn't count is everything. And reputations, once established, have a remarkably long shelf-life.